I had an appointment with my midwife today. Not much to report. We were able to process our Mexico-trauma with her, which was nice. We discussed referrals for chiropractic, recommendations for supplements, and the pros/cons of circumcision (wow). But I did learn today about a major difference between midwifery care and doctor care. When I asked the midwife about whether we should be having sex, her answer was somewhere along the lines of, "Well, it's up to you. It could cause more bleeding, but gentle sex is likely ok. But really, make a choice regarding what feels right for you." And more info about what feels comfortable and safe for me. Now, if I'd asked my previous doctor, do you know what she would have said? No. One of the problems I had with that doctor was her overly cautious, shut-the-door to ambivalence approach to medicine. But now I find that here I am maybe just wishing the midwife would have done the same thing and said a clear-cut-NO.
Is this me? Am I completely dissatisfied with whatever type of treatment I receive? Am I trying out medical practitioners like a grown-up Goldilocks? But then I realized, no, I think this is just my fear talking. I think I wanted a black and white answer so as to not leave things up to me to decide. I wanted her to tell me that I am "better" or that I am "Not better." But the truth is, who knows?? So either, have sex or not. It's up to me.
In regards to other questions, I liked her flexible approach. For example, then I asked her the oh-so-important-question that is spoken about on Forums as if it is the most important thing in the world: "Should I be laying on my back? Ha. And here I liked her ambivalent answer. Basically, "It's up to you and what you feel comfortable with. Some women can sleep on their backs the whole pregnancy. Some can't. Your body will tell you if you are going numb from lack of blood supply. You'll wake up and roll over." Now, that...I agree with. So, when there's less fear involved, I guess I'm okay with a bit of flexibility.
What else? Oh. Well, I got lectured a bit about my Food Diary. Part of standard treatment is to track a week's worth of food and water intake. I was feeling pretty good about mine...drinking a ton of water (50-90oz a day) and eating no processed foods. But then she kept saying I could drink more water and lectured me about my pasta intake. Ooops. Yes, I eat way too much pasta. My dad is Italian, what do you want? B. pointed out that pasta is technically a processed food. Really? Even when I cover it with homemade marinara sauce?? *sigh* She said that I could continue to eat this way, but that it could lead to higher weight gain and a bigger baby. Damn. Why do I feel like I need to go back on WW? (In case you're curious, I've gained about a total of 10 lbs so far...not so bad, right?)
And then....my favorite part of the exam. Aka, the part where she plays with my belly. My fundal height measured at 22.5, which I will be 22 weeks Thursday, so that's within the range of normal. Then she asked where I'd been feeling him move and I showed her. She felt around and showed me that his head is low down on the left side and his feet are up high on the right (where I feel him move). How cool. Like she was showing me my baby through my skin. Wow. And....heartbeat time. So freaking amazing. I laid there with my hand behind my head, looking down at B.'s face and listening to our baby's heart beating. I'm in love.
P.S. We bought the Bugaboo! I officially own a stroller!