Thursday, February 21, 2013

Dos Por Uno

This post is going to be a two-for-one. Lucky you!

Post #1

We told.......everyone! No, I'm just kidding. We told our families. I told my sister first. I asked her if I could stop by her house on my way home from work because I "had something to give to her." When I got there, I told her I had her present on my cell phone and she said "On your cell phone? Still not suspecting anything. Then I handed her my phone with a picture of my digital "Pregnant" test. Her reaction was Hollywood-movie perfect. HUGE gaping face ending in a "Whaaaaaat?" with a giant smile. I mean, you'd think she didn't know we were trying!

That same night we told my husband's parents, who are visiting from out of town. We had hoped to wait a few days, but as soon as we all sat down, they asked right away, out right. We just couldn't lie. Now, I'm not particularly close with my in-laws....I mean, we get along well and I like them, but they're not my parents, if you know what I mean. But, when I saw their faces and how happy they were, I got teary eyed and a little choked up. It was suddenly real.

Then, today, I told my parents. I wish I could have told them in person, instead of two separate phone calls. The phone calls just weren't the same as telling someone in person. That being said, both of my parents were ecstatic and excited and wanted to know when I was due, how far along, how I was feeling...all of the questions that made me feel like a pregnant person. So yeah. Now it's out there. People know. Here we go!

Post #2

Another thing happened. I went riding today. Now, I've mentioned here and here how important horseback riding is to me. And how I know that I will have to give it up at some point during my pregnancy. Numerous all-knowing websites have told me that horseback riding during pregnancy is a no-no. But in real life, most of the women I know who are avid riders/trainers and mothers have ridden throughout most of their pregnancy. For me? I always knew that I would stop riding once I got pregnant. Just not worth the risk. Now that I'm pregnant (*gaSp*-did I just say that?), I was wondering whether to ride through my scheduled rides in March or just stop at the end of this month.

I had two more rides scheduled for February. Today was one of them. I was still undecided as I drove up for my lesson. Today we worked on extended canter and downward transitions to trot - with no stirrups. Now, downward transitions trot is the most awkward, bouncy transition out there. If you don't know what you're doing, you get bounced around like a rag doll. Normally, this would be no big deal for me. Today? Without the security of the stirrups, I found myself getting tense, rigid and scared. Yes, scared! The fear and tension made me bounce all of the place, which made me feel like I was going to fall off, with then of course, made me scared again. I haven't been scared riding in a long time.

And then I realized. I was scared I was going to fall off. Scared I was going to fall off and hurt the baby. Whoa.

And the fear makes a rider dangerous. It makes you ride in unsafe ways. Now, as soon as I realized what was happening, I relaxed and just rode. I rode like I know how to ride. But those few moments of fear opened my eyes wide. I am not just ME anymore. I'm Me+One.

So what did I decide? I am going to ride one more time to finish out the month and then call it good.

I feel good about my decision. But I was also sad driving home. I don't mind giving up my other love affair with wine, but giving up horseback riding means giving up something special I do for myself to help myself feel calmer and more balanced. It was the first thing I gave up as woman-without-a-child so I can become a mother. That's a big deal. Kinda gives me shivers.

I think I'll take up hiking again.
p.s. As of tonight, I have officially missed my period.


  1. Oh I am so happy for you. And you know, a friend of mine who's a rider did ride (and rock-climbed) all through the end.
    But I understand the fear.
    Maybe I would stop for know (you know until the 12 week scan and everything is properly "attached), and then see how you feel on the 2nd and 3rd trimester.
    And well, this is just temporary you know? So don't be too hard on yourself about giving this up, it will come back! You'll ride again.

    1. Amanda, I know that a lot of women do ride throughout most of the pregnancy. But I feel like I'm not really going to have time for it once I have a newborn anyhow (it's a major time commitment) and so I think it's just time to take a break from it and then return when I'm able to re-commit. As far as stopping for the 1st tri, I think the 1st tri is the only time you can actually really safely ride, without your balance being disrupted, so after that your chances off falling are increased. It's so a lose-lose.

      But you are right. I'll ride again for sure. It's just time to take a break.

  2. First of all, I totally know what you mean about the in-laws. At the end of the day no matter how nice they, they just aren't YOUR parents. I'm so happy for you that you are basking in all of your pregnant glory!

    I also can relate to giving up things for the sake of pregnancy. It's tough, especially because it may be hard to find as much time for those things after we have children. I do believe it is very important to have things in your life that are just for you though. For me, I think doing my own things keeps my marriage strong and makes me a happier person.

    1. You know, I think that horses will always be a part of my life. But in the past few years I have only been doing it "half-way." Riding once a week is barely enough to stay in shape, much less continue to advance. That has been fine for me, but now I think I'll take a step back and then rejoin it later.

      But I agree...I'll need something else. I may take up watercolors again. Hmm....

  3. Love the "Me+One" comment. I remember the same feeling when I got on a place at 7 weeks pregnant. All of a sudden, I was terrified of flying!

    Is there anything that you can do for yourself during this pregnancy to replace riding? Pre-natal massages or something?

    1. Prenatal massages sound like a great idea! I also think I am going to start hiking again (seems like a safe way to get exercise) and start getting acupuncture.

      Annnnnd maybe prenatal yoga? That's a stretch for someone who's never done yoga in her life!

  4. AW, I am feeling SO elated for you. I've only been reading your blog for, like, 2 days, but I'm so excited for your journey into motherhood. I'm tearing up thinking of you tearing up!

    Happy happy.

    1. Welcome to my blog! Thank you for your kind, kind comment :)

      I'm going to go check out your blog.

  5. I think I could keep it up for awhile longer, but knowing I'll have to stop eventually, now just seems as good of time as any. Plus, its not the exercise component I'm worried about (sadly, I'll have to replace it with some other type of exercise!), it's more the jostling or falling part.


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